I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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