I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Randomize
