tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
