i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
