This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
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His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
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After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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