dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
