He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
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