Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize