It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
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