I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
