oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
