It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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