I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
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