he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
