we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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