so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
