if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
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