I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
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