TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
