He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Randomize
