i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize
