just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
She needs sedatives and a leash
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
Randomize
