He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
I just googled if crying burns calories
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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