dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
