i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
