Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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