I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
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