I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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