she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
