So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
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