Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
Randomize
