im holly from the hills drunk
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
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