there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
