I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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