Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
I could have mohawked her pubes.
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
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