He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
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So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
you inspire me to be a worse person
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I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit