what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
