bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
