I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
