Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
