I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
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