your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
Randomize
