We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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