After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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