upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Randomize
