the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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