is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
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Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
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You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
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