like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Randomize
