Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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