Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
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