Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
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Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
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I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
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